Service brings about the greatest happiness. Personal growth brings the greatest happiness. The two are the same, and develop in every conversation and every place we find ourselves. Here’s how it works: “The more I try, the harder it gets” is a common complaint, because one feels the frustration burn inside. That burning gives place to empathy -- the power to carry a burden with someone. If you can walk through a trial with someone, you have participated in the greatest sort of service. The Atonement of Jesus Christ is, after all, the Lord taking upon himself all our burdens. Our capacity to serve in this way grows as we learn mindfulness, the Tao, and to try.
Bear with me as I briefly explain Mindfulness and the Tao. Then I will show how they all relate to God’s example of service. All of this is aimed toward personal growth, and how it can be used to serve those around us.
Firstly, Mindfulness is the essence of Buddha's teaching (3*). Constantly our minds wander to a place other than where we are. There is always something better to do -- Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media are easy ways to forget where we are and to distract ourselves from the important things. Or when on a date, we can find ourselves thinking about work rather than our sweetheart. Master Oogway put it best to a stressed out Panda when he said, “You are too concerned about what was and what will be. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” Mindfulness looks for the best thing to do in each moment. That skill comes with prayer, meditation, and fasting.
By studying when we should study, working when we should be working, playing when we should play, and all the while being mindful of people around us, we will begin to squeeze the juice out of every moment. The way we live is a service, because we’ll learn the best way to live and increase our capacity to help others do the same.
Secondly, the Tao is a way of saying "how things work", or the natural order of things. Going against it is like swimming upstream and is very tiring and unproductive. Philosophical Taoism strives for Wu Wei--how one lives with the Tao. Roger R. Keller, a graduate from Yale in World Religions and retired professor of BYU wrote in is his book Light and Truth: A Latter Day Saint Guide to World Religions “Wu Wei is to follow the spirit.” It teaches when to try hard or when to let things take their natural course. Let's say you want to become a better basketball player. When you are with your coach and team, you practice hard; when you are with your friends its okay to relax and enjoy a game of pick-up. If you're intense all the time, you'll probably scare your friends off. If you relax at practice, you get a ticked off coach, annoyed friends, and your skills probably won’t improve. Things need to be done at the right time. That is Wu-Wei. (2*)
Mindfulness teaches us how to be present. Wu Wei teaches us when to do what. By asking the question, “What is the best thing for me to be doing right now?” Brings the realization that among all of today's errands, the priority is the person I can influence. After all, the base of God’s happiness is first His capacity to bless us; then it’s glorified as we choose to follow him. (1*) We pattern this by building our own character, so that we too can positively influence others.
Thirdly, to serve others at all times, we simply try. Here’s a personal example:church can be boring. Some speakers are monotone, many say routine jokes; it is flipping hard to listen sometimes! This is when ADD starts to kick in. Even so, I try to pay attention. By trying to consistently listen I begin to see the person saying the words, and I relate to them. This practice over a long period of time has been frustrating and rewarding. I’ve become more disciplined, a better listener, and I actually enjoy sacrament meeting. Now when people struggle with things they don’t like to do, and talk to me, they see that I understand. I can bear that feeling with them.
Inasmuch as I constantly try to do the right thing, I realize how weak I am. Sometimes I accidentally insult someone; sometimes I find myself not using a moment to connect with someone when perhaps I could have inspired them in some way. Sometimes I find that all day I've been doing "important things", and missed an opportunity to wash the dishes with my mom; and connect with her and share her load. Seeing others struggle and wanting to help them forces me to see where I can help, and how I can improve; Surely I am moving forward.
The first step to change is recognizing things to improve on. (For Christians the first step of repentance is recognition. Then we open ourselves up to the ennobling grace of God.) Progression in the power to serve, or Happiness, is built upon the smallest instances of everyday life. We can win every situation if we try to follow the Tao by being mindful.
Heaven is Eternal, earth everlasting.
They endure this way because they
do not live for themselves.
In the same way, the wise person
puts himself last,
and thereby finds himself first;
Holds himself outside,
and thereby remains at the center;
Abandons himself,
and is thereby fulfilled.
- The Tao te Ching of Lao Tzu, #7
*Sources
Moses 1:39, the Pearl of Great Price
#8 and #10 of The Tao Te Ching of Lao Tzu, Translated by Brian Browne Walker
3. Chapter 11: Right Mindfulness. The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching by Thich Nhat Hanh
